October 2008
96 posts
Zombie
My energy is drained, my skin is pale, I left my brain somewhere back in fifth period, and if I had the strength to check, I could probably confirm that my pulse has stopped.
I was on campus by 6:15AM for a government study session, but not for government, ironically. I sat in class with 30 of my closest high school friends — not, I don’t have friends — and studied for AP...
September 2008
71 posts
The Weather
Jamie: It rained today.
Dad: It rained?!
Jamie: Yeah for like fifteen minutes.
Dad: It rained?
Jamie: Yeah. Fatty drops the size of my fist.
Dad: In San Diego?
Jamie: Yeah.
Dad: Are you sure?
Jamie: Yes, father.
Dad: Really?!
Jamie: YEAH, DAD.
160 Days and Counting
I’m exhausted beyond belief.
My days have fallen into one-meal routines where I get to nap for a few hours, wake up, head straight to first period for fifteen minutes of reading as soon as I step on campus, run the course of my day, head home, eat, nap, wake up and poke at the pile of homework, nap in the middle of the night until about 6AM, and do it all over again. Yeah. I’ve...
Prejudice
I am a horrible, critical, prejudice hyprocrite. It’s my reigning quaility. Not.
Saturday night I accompanied a friend down south for a drink up. I didn’t know anyone except who I had come with, so I made friends. Ish. I introduced myself to everyone that crossed my path, but ultimately ended up sitting at the dining table with a bag of chips. Oh, the fate of the designated...
Earlimart - Happy Alone
It’s 3AM and even...
Weekend
I’ll elaborate when I have time (and internet, since it’s been lagging lately).
Friday: Muslim Youth Center, Alicia’s Pasta Party, Chelsea’s House, Callahan’s, registered for the SATs five minutes before deadline, hung out with Carlo, hung out with Nick, asleep by 12:30AM.
Saturday: Leo woke me up, Street Fair (for the first time), bought four books for $1 at the...
“A woman-of-color who writes poetry or paints or dances or makes movies knows...”
– Gloria Anzaldúa (via aliciadk) (via alohanico) (via britticisms) (via lenachen)
Mark hypothesized that this would be the...
Donavon Frankenreiter - The Way It Is
I’ve...
“You’re very different from Misa… she was always very happy, she had...”
– Mr. Prosser, my AP Government teacher, comparing me to my sister, as if I didn’t get that enough in life from everyone else. But since he had to point this out, I’ve made a note to always be exaggeratedly happy in his class. Then again, there’s a chance that doing this might just...
Love
I was walking to the bathroom with Tammy today when, underneath the large tree centered in the courtyard, we spotted a couple. They were gazing into each other’s eyes, making us a tad queasy. The guy lifted his hands and brushed both sides of his girlfriend’s hair, but instead of letting her hair fall behind her back, he held it up. It was just incredibly awkward and prolonged. I...
“The American Apparel V-neck shirt, Pabst Blue Ribbon beer and Parliament...”
– Hipster: The Dead End of Western Civilization (via tatatina); a sentence that sufficiently sums up my summer, followed by two sentences that describes every single person that surrounds me, and in part, myself.
Beast
I have a pimple on my nose. Pain aside, it obstructs my vision.
No, not because of its sheer size.
I can’t place my glasses on its usual place on my nose because the damn beast gets in the way. So, aside from being an eye sore, it also makes my eyes sore.
rulesformyunbornson:
REQUIRED LISTENING: Hall...
Jack Johnson - Go On
I’m seven months...
Critique
For someone who prides themselves in having balls, I am ashamed of how apprehensive I am when it comes time for someone to critique my writing.
My English teacher passed back our personal statements for college applications today, and I never even glanced at mine. The moment he slapped the pages down on my desk, I swiftly turned it face-down. I was too embarrassed to even begin to fathom what...
Make Sure Your Speakers Are On
ephemeron:
This will never, ever get old:
http://youmakemetouchyourhandsforstupidreasons.ytmnd.com/
Jason Mraz - Who Needs Shelter
This is the first...
Stranded
I wanted to depart from Irvine the moment I woke up today, but alas, my father didn’t want to pick me up anymore.
I called Tri and asked if I could hitch a ride back to San Diego with him. He agrees, I feel relief.
The day passes and night falls, yet, I’m still stuck within the city limits of Irvine.
Tri is too lazy to drive because “it’s late.”
Misa gives me her...
“Jamie IS sex.”
– Matt Simmons Not an insult, nor is it a compliment.
“contemplating dropping out of high school, geez can we say “anti...”
– Emmeline’s suggestion after I proposed dropping out of high school. Sounds really, really good right about now.
Fuck
After what seemed like two minutes of sleep, the boys came back to their apartment with marijuana and three girls, one of which is the screaming/cackling one.
I was angry for two seconds, but then Emmeline made me realize I was a guest in their house.
So now I just have to deal with this shit.
And be nice.
Which is hard.
Because I’m a bitch.
"The 'Vine"
Tonight was evidence that my socializing skills have surely depleted. Usually, I am determined to make acquaintances when I attend parties, but tonight, I slipped out the front door before the stroke of midnight, never having spoken to more than four people.
I accompanied Misa on her trek back to Irvine to move into her new campus apartment, which she will call her second home for the year. I...
Mark Capil - I Don’t Really Have a Name For...
Lovage - To Catch a Thief
Mark turned me onto...
You Know There's Something Wrong With You When...
You find profound satisfaction in sitting at home, eating baby carrots, and taking a nap.
That is, of course, after you’ve cried your empty little heart out and you’ve completely gone insane. There’s nothing else for you to do than to sleep because, after all, it’s the closest thing to death.
Shortly after, you wake up, feel a hell of a lot better, and the only thing...
Spasm
Do you ever feel like someone’s… watching you? I’m not talking about that Peeping Tom staring at you through your window right now. Kidding. But really, like a higher being. Not God. Something creepier than God.
My internet spasms and shuts off every time I try to blog or chat because it knows (and I mean KNOWS) that I’m procrastinating. It’s been doing it...
“The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this notion rested solely...”
– Russell Baker (via enquotations)
I Had Just Cleaned The Bathroom
Last night around 1AM I felt the pang of hunger. I went outside and shoved a plate of pasta into my mouth and went back into my room to study for a psychology test, which, by the way, I really shouldn’t have bothered to do. I mean, might as well face facts and accept my inevitable failure. Of life.
Digression over.
So, I ate the pasta. I fell asleep sometime after I gave up attempting...
“I think you should always ask yourself, ‘If I was 8, would I hesitate to...”
– Mike Karnell. Great advice. (via jakehurwitz)
Four
I’m zeroing in on 4AM. While this was acceptable during summer and something I did on the daily, I do have to wake for school in two hours.
Sidetrack
Is it wrong that it’s 2AM and I’m attempting to finish my AP Psychology crap, yet all I can think is: “Hey it’s Tuesday… House is on tonight.”
Which, in retrospect, is too short a thought for me to be pondering this long.
Nicole Willis and the Soul Investigators - If This...
Personal Statement
I’ve spent the last hour writing and rewriting my personal statement. Everything sounds so completely and utterly generic.
So I erased it.
I’m depending on these two essays to navigate me through my life and career choices. I’m depending on these two essays to get me into college. Unlike my Seminar counterparts, I don’t have a 4.8 gpa to wave in the faces of the...
Quick Recap
Around nine last night I headed to Matt’s house to accompany Emmeline and Matt to North Park for an artwalk. Since Emmeline didn’t get off until nine thirty-ish, I gave up hope after finding out it closes at ten.
I left Matt’s after fifteen minutes and headed to Pizza Hut where I had dinner with Madonna on her break. She made us a pizza and a Shirley Temple-esque drink with...
Tyrone Wells - No Good Without You
I felt...
Mates of State - Parachutes (Funeral Song)
I...
NYU and Dad's Priorities Concerning Me
Dad: Apply for a scholarship, if you get it, I let you go. Otherwise, it's too far, it's too costly.
Jamie: C'mon Dad, I'll send you a new picture of me every time I change my hair.
Dad: No, I want to see you every week like I see your sister. I want to chew you out. Yelling at you on the phone is no fun.
“Wit is the salt of conversation, not the food.”
– Even my fortune cookie is telling me that sometimes, I don’t need to be so damn mouthy.
Happy Birthday Tri
Jamie: happy birthday my love
Tri: Thaaankss what're you doing
Jamie: Sitting at home alone thinking about you and how you're nineteen.
Tri: Haha, for some reason, I believe you.
Jamie: (wow, do I really seem that pathetic...?)
Good Morning SD
Within the first five seconds of the KUSI segment at MMHS, we made our overbearing imbecility evident.
Props to whoever made that “Good Morning MARADERS” poster behind the reporter. You forgot the ‘u’.
AM Pep Rally
At 6AM tomorrow morning, KUSI (a local news station) is coming to my high school to film for their new “Alarm Clock Pep Rally” segment. While school spirit isn’t something I usually partake in, I got to thinking, ‘what the hey, I’m a senior, why not?’ Plus, the first school they did this segment on was Eastlake High, and that gym was filled to the brim. The...
Yael Naïm - Endless Song of Happiness
I...
Karma is a Bitch
Back problems are frequent in Mira Mesa since my high school stopped giving their students lockers years and years ago. Poor, tiny, asian boys scamper around campus holding 30 pounds worth of smarts in their bookbags and backpacks.
Because of this fact, receiving one of the sixteen square lockers Mr. Corr provides for his students in his classroom is quite the gem. You snatch one and you snatch...
“I know I’m having a bad pms week when commercials are making me cry.”
– Emmeline I’m currently having a bad PMS week, and I have to say, it sucks being a woman sometimes. Just sometimes. When I get back into my manipulative, teasing ways, I’ll enjoy it again.
If I Could Write
It’s killing me.
Especially since personal statements are due soon for college applications.
This is my one outlet, the one ear that listens without judgment and without interruption. It doesn’t make me feel like an ass after I’ve spoken my mind, and it doesn’t make me feel stupid after I’ve admitted something that I didn’t want to. This blog is the only...
tuneage:
Chairlift - “Bruises”
Brooklyn based...
Coconut Records - Ask Her To Dance
I think...
“But will he love me like Calvin loves Alice?”
– About Alice (recommended to me by Emmeline) is a short novel written by Calvin Trillin for his wife. One of the many in fact, since he routinely wrote about her in many of his pieces. The story reads as if Calvin is sitting next to you, giving you story time for an hour or so. Although there were...